- Identify trends in expression of emotions and in help-seeking behavior across genders
- Explore specific societal labels or judgments applied to the expression of certain emotions based on masculine vs. feminine identity socialization and other cultural influences
- Challenge toxic masculinity and build skills that promote healthy emotional expression and help-seeking for all folks, especially men/boy and masculine-identified individuals
Prior to the beginning of the activity create a line on the floor, approximately 10 feet long, using masking tape, painter’s tape, or yarn. Label one end with “uncomfortable” and the opposite end as “comfortable.”
Virtual modification: use the chat function to submit a number on a scale from 1 (uncomfortable) to 10 (comfortable).
Most of our personal experiences tell us that boys/men are different from girls/women. Research shows that, compared to girls/women or feminine-identified folks,
- A third of men/masculine-identified individuals think society expects them to ‘be a man’ and ‘suck it up’ when they feel sad or scared.
- A third said they feel they should ‘hide or suppress their feelings when they feel sad or scared.
- Men tend to see seeking help as a sign of weakness. Based on research, they are less likely to recognize, talk about, and seek treatment for depression.
- The result is boys/men and masculine-identified individuals have higher rates of completed suicide and higher rates of substance use and dependence.
Today we are going to explore the research further through a visual representation of our group’s comfort level with emotional expression.
I will state an emotion and you will move along the line to represent how you feel, from comfortable to uncomfortable, expressing, or sharing the emotion with a close friend or trusted adult. Please try to be as honest as you can be – there’s no right or wrong answer here!
**Virtual modification: using the chat function, encourage students, if they feel comfortable, to write a number in the chat based on how comfortable they would feel (1 being uncomfortable, 5 being neutral and 10 being comfortable) expressing or sharing the following listed emotions with a friend or trusted adult.
- Anger
- Jealousy
- Pride/Confidence
- Confusion
- Joy
- Fear
- Anxiety
- Shame/Embarrassment
- Pain
- Sadness
- Hopelessness
- Love/Affection
- Boredom
- Loneliness
- Guilt
KEY TAKEWAYS: Affirmations about Feelings
- All feelings are valid.
- Feelings serve a purpose.
- A feeling signals to us our bodily response to a situation.
- Allow yourself to feel your feelings.
- Allow others to feel theirs.
- What observations do you have based on the activity?
- Which of the feelings did you find most comfortable expressing? Which ones did you find difficult to express?
- How do you think your comfort level with expressing these feelings may relate to your gender and culture?
- What cultural messages have you received in relation to masculinity vs. femininity that may have shaped your perception of certain emotional expression as being “tough” or “weak”?
- E.g. “machismo” in Latine culture, the “strong Black women” stereotype, “emotion stoicism” in Asian culture
- How do you think these factors play into your comfort with being vulnerable and/or seeking help when struggling?
- In what ways do you think suppressing or minimizing emotions can affect your wellbeing and relationships?
- What is one thing you could do to accept and express your feelings in constructive ways, especially when you feel vulnerable (sadness, hurt, hopelessness, etc.)?
- See tips/resources below for how to identify and accept feelings as first steps to regulating your own emotions
Basic Emotion Regulation Skills
Additional Reading/Resources